i just got back from lunch with my closest co-workers. it was enjoyable; filled with laughter, reminiscing about the past and speculating on the future. i keep joking that i'll be back in six months when this new venture goes under. of course, deep inside it's quite a real concern. but doubt and worry are no strangers to me; they've been a part of who i am for a very long time. and so i brush them aside and march on, holding onto whatever good memories i've picked up along the way.
my first day at this company was may 28th, 2001, making my tenure six years and a little over four months. strangely, most of my memories at this company involve farting or awkward encounters in the restroom (i'll save those stories for another time), but what i remember most is how i'd gotten the job.
by the time i'd finished my final internship in the summer of 2000, i'd amassed a fairly impressive resume and was able to build a daunting schedule of interviews. during that last year of school, i spent a good part of the week talking to recruiters and had a fly-out almost every other week. i was having the time of my life; seeing parts of the country i would've never seen otherwise, being wined and dined by fast-talking, well-dressed people. before thanksgiving, i'd already secured a handful of offers, one of which was extended before i even returned to school.
and then all hell broke loose.
the stock market began its descent in september and, while people stayed generally optimistic (or entered a state of denial), the stories began creeping in. so and so company is folding; so and so company has no real revenue. all of the sudden, whereas before you could negotiate an offer upwards by tens of thousands of dollars, hiring managers were no longer willing to budge. entire divisions were being laid off. one company that rescinded its offer to me had gone from over 400 employees in three offices to a roomful of managers and execs. the shit hit the fan--in a major way--and the stage was set for one of the biggest collapses in financial history.
by early spring, things had slowed down considerably for me. hope had deflated and the few meager offers i was still sitting on began to look like a safe out. my only fly-out during the new year was to connecticut for a small software firm in the finance industry. knowing it could very well be the last of such experiences, i savored every moment of it. with the company's tab at my disposal, i strolled through downtown stamford, grabbing a quick bite, and then caught a late movie--the only time i'd ever went to see a movie alone. later, i flagged down a cabbie in a mercedes and had a pleasant conversation with him all the way to the hotel. i slept hard on the down covered bed and enjoyed a brisk breakfast in the westin cafe. it was a nice escape before heading back to school and facing reality.
this past monday, i accepted an offer from a tiny startup in the social networking space. we inked the deal in the conference room of their funding firm, the room in which they've worked for the last few months due to the lack of a real office. they told me they'll soon be moving "the office" to one of the co-founders' parents' garage.
"just like all the great startups, eh?" says one of them. i smile and imagine how, five years from now, after having made my billions, i'll look back and have this great story to tell about how three dudes working in a garage managed to take over the internet. "yeah, it's gonna be great," i respond enthusiastically.
next friday is the last day at my current job. my friends will say this is long overdue, and i would certainly agree, but it was much much harder than i thought it'd be. this is actually the second time i've tried to leave my company. i'm still trying to figure out why i was successful this time around, but my guess is that it has to do with time. there are a number of reasons--i'm bored, i'm uninspired, i need to feel like i'm making something people love--but in the end, i think it's just about time.
there's a point where, after some amount of time has passed, you feel as if you'd be stuck, almost regressing even, if you didn't move on. the momentum slowly fades and you become a slave to inertia. i guess i feel like if i don't leave now, i'll end up just like my dad; just like the generation before us who gave their lives to any given company, grinding it day by day from graduation to retirement. i can't do that. i'd die before i let that happen to me.
so, here's to saying good-bye to six years and four months of 5-hour days, ridiculous salaries, and constant web-surfing, and saying hello to 80-hour weeks, being dirt poor, constant web-authoring, and, most importantly, being happy and excited.
and now, a quick excerpt from the news. i found myself in the mercury. this was some sorta geek/startup thingie i went to with my former biz partner, whom by the way i owe majorly for opening doors and pushing me in the right direction. the last year wouldn't have been possible without him.
